shIT Happens Cards deal with real eBay Happenings. We couldn't make this stuff up:
- You use Feature Listing
for an additional $17.95 for your widget which is listed for domestic sale only using BIN (Buy It Now).
Within an hour, your item is purchased by a bidder in Ethiopia who will pay you a little extra if you send him your widget right
away to a third party in the US. eBay refuses to refund your Feature Listing fees, OR any other fees, but sends you a
auto-response warning you about shipping to third parties. Pay Bank $10.00.
- Buyer files SNAD. PayPal freezes your account. Pay bank $10.00.
- Listing Typo. You meant to list shipping as $4.80 priority mail but accidently listed it as $48.00. eBay pulls your listing and
suspends you for two weeks for fee-avoidance. Pay bank $20.00.
- Whoops! The eBay Franchise Store you bought while thinking it was a real money-maker, isn't! Pay bank $20.00.
- Sniped!
You lost the absolutely perfect gift for your spouse at the last minute because you were too cheap to bid higher. Pay the bank $20.00
- Use a money order to buy a "guaranteed authentic" designer handbag that you discover has different stitching than what the
authorized retailers carry. Try to communicate with the now NARU
(Not A Registered User) seller. Pay Bank $20.00.
- You use the eBay Gift Icon for your listing indicating you
offer gift services.
When you ship to the gift recipient, you find your PayPal Seller Protection
is not in effect because you did not ship to a confirmed address. Pay bank $10 plus a second $10 for filing fee.
- Item sells big. Two buyers get into bidding war over your auction. Bank pays you $25.00.
- Gold Power Seller card. This card entitles you to believe that you have special telephone support, which you don't,
and is otherwise useless. Try it with salsa or put it back in the deck.
- Item Not Received ("INR")
dispute filed with PayPal resolved in your favor by Amanda. Bank pays you $25.00.
- You get an item real cheap at auction when the seller misspells a key-word. Bank pays you $25.00.
- You email eBay with problem and eBay's 'bots that scan and route emails actually read correctly your key words and you actually
get a useful answer. After you recover, bank pays you $50.00
- Vacation from Posting Board. You said something the
PINKs didn't like. Pay bank $10.00.
- You are restricted because of Non-Performing Seller Restrictions. eBay tells you to work it out with buyer who is suspended and
eBay won't provide contact information. Pay bank $20.00.
- eBay sends you an email telling you that your automatic electronic monthly payment hasn't been received, saying "payment method
declined". You panic and immediately make one on-line credit card payment so your account won't get suspended for non-payment.
Oppps! Because of a computer glitch by eBay, you have been double-billed
and eBay will not refund the additional payment. eBay will keep the extra payment, applying against your next due payment,
denying you of the funds while collecting interest of the money in the bank. Pay bank $20.00.
- You sell ten items to a buyer who pays you through PayPal with a combined payment of $367.82. You ship all ten items in one box to the
verifed PayPal address. After buyer receives all ten items, buyer files a dispute concerning one item worth $10.00. PayPal freezes
the entire amount of $367.82 until dispute is resolved. Your are denied the money for month. Pay bank $20.00.
- PayPal has a computer glitch, causing the inncorrect confirmed address
to appear. You ship six packages to the PayPal confrimed addresses only to have them either disappear or be returned to you.
The buyers blame you for the losses and delays. Pay bank $20.00 for PayPal's error.
- Sellers on eBay do not purchase exclusive rights to web pages on eBay. eBay may, in its sole discretion, and without the seller's
consent or payment to the seller, place third-party advertisements on any Web page within the eBay site.
True or False? (http://pages.ebay.com/help/sell/fees.html)
- Your listing has been ended. You complied with the rules, but you neglected the, "non-published" DISCRETIONARY rules. Pay bank $20
- Ebay announces new policy, RETROACTIVE to four months ago. No appeal, no explanation, GOODBYE 8 YEAR SELLER,
register new selling id and start over. Pay bank $20.
- Congratulations! Your potential customer just clicked on a banner ad and qualified for a no-cost car loan at www.ClickHereToLeaveEbay.com
Pay bank $20 and hope they come back.
- Someone hacks into the eBay database and posts names and credit card numbers
on the Trust & Safety Board. eBay pulls the board
entirely but doesn't tell those people that their credit numbers have been compromised. Your wife demands you explain the
$480 charge at a strip club, a $360 charge for the Lonesome Love Lodge, and $3,200 charged to Victoria's Secret. Don't pay the
bank anything; you'll need it all for the divorce lawyer.
- You have an eBay store and decide to use Selling Manager Pro ("SMPro") to track your eBay sales and inventory.
Alas, in a "rare" moment, eBay accidently closes your eBay store, which in turn cancels SMPro, causing all files in
SMPro to be lost. eBay restores your store but all your files in
SMPro are lost. Pay bank $20 for not maintaining your business files on YOUR computer instead of eBay's.
- eBay falsely claims a third party has gained access to your account and terminates all forty of your
listings. You used SYI (Sell Your Item) and didn't keep a copy of your
listings on your hard drive. eBay restores your account and apologizes for the mistake but (again falsely) insists they cannot
restore your lisings removed in error. You now must remeasure all items and recreate all of the descriprions for your missinig
listings. Pay bank $20.00 and save listing on your computer from now on.
- You use the eBay-supplied shipping calculator to compute shipping for your listings.
Ebay has recently
upgraded the shipping calculator and the amount displayed to the purchaser
is lower than the actual shipping. Of course eBay denies any responsibility, pointing out to you that you use their software
at YOUR risk. You lose money on shipping for every item sold. Pay bank $20.
- Ebay rolls out 75-cent "Gallery Plus" add-on, which momentarily doubles the postage-stamp-sized picture displayed with
Search results. Glitch in TurboLister update marks your Store listings with Gallery Plus. When your 1,300 Store
listings begin their next 30 day relist, they pop up with Gallery Plus activated. Ebay uses an old card number
to drain your bank account while it runs you around for 3 weeks. Lose your primary supplier when the check for
your last shipment bounces. Pay the bank $30, but get $2 back, then get $5 back, then get $3 back, then get
$1 back, then get $4 back.
- Ebay "improves" the dispute console at year's end in an effort to improve cash flow. Unpaid Items (UPIs) cannot be closed
to refund seller fees because of the "new" glitch". eBay collects interest on the "retained" fees while the "glitch" is being
investigated and "corrected". Pay bank $20.00.
- eBay "glitches" and rules never impact eBay in a negative manner. They always involve "fees" and/or "payments" being "floated"
at the fiscal advantage of eBay and PayPal who collect "interest" while the eBay buyers and sellers sit on their collective hands.
Pay bank $20.00.
- You have an eBay store and you want to "revise" your listings in quantity (all at once). eBay sends you the following message when
you inquire as to what has happened when you can't revise in quantity:
"Dear eBay Member,
Thank you for writing eBay in regard to revising your listings.
You should be able to revise quantity if it is a store listing. However, due to some recent changes in formatting some
of them you won't be able to. It is hard to say which ones because we have added different values in the system. If you
find that it is not working you best bet is to let the listings end and start a new listing. Once you have done this you
will be able to revise the listings in the new format.
We are committed to making your eBay experiences pleasant and fulfilling."
Pay bank $20.00.
- eBay restricts your account for selling designer merchandise. When you inquire, eBay tells you that the length of the restriction,
the percentage amount of the restriction, and other factors concerning the restrictions are
proprietary.
Pay bank $20.00 and hope for the best.
- All these years you have carefully cultivated a high feedback rating. eBay cahnges the rules and now counts neutrals as negative feedback.
Your feedback drops like a rock because you didn't pay any ayttntion to the neutrals because they didn't count. Before, that is.
Pay bank $10.00.
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