Tabberone's Hall of Shame - Merle Norman Cosmetics

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Merle Norman Cosmetics
Hall Of Shame Member
Added April 27, 2007

Lawyer For Merle Norman Admits Cosmetics
Maker Sells Illegal Drugs and Paraphernalia

A Tabberone Exclusive!

April 27, 2007
Hartsel, Colo -
The lawyer representing cosmetic manufacturer and retailer Merle Norman has admitted that her client's products constitute illegal Drugs and Drug Paraphernalia.
In a privileged communication with the on-line auction eBay, Jennifer (last name not disclosed by eBay) of Kinsella Weitzman Iser Kump & Aldisert LLP, of Santa Monica, California, admitted products manufactured by Merle Norman violate FDA regulations and should not be allowed to be sold on eBay.
eBay, at the request of Merle Norman, apparently through their attorneys at Kinsella Weitzman Iser Kump & Aldisert LLP, of Santa Monica, California, has been terminating auctions of Merle Norman products, telling the auction sellers that the merchandise cannot be sold on eBay because it violates FDA regulations.

One example of Merle Norman merchandise being banned from eBay for violating FDA regulations is LUXIVAŽ Moisture Rich Facial Treatment which according to the Merle Norman web site is a:
10-minute intensive moisturizing treatment leaves stressed and fatigued skin noticeably smoother, softer, refreshed and revitalized. Vitamins A,B,C,D and E derivatives and botanicals provide firming properties, and help reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles. Natural ingredients provide the most advanced hydration to immediately revitalize a dull, dry complexion.
Inquiring minds want to know just what are these "natural ingredients" that violate FDA regulations and how long has Merle Norman been foisting them upon an unsuspecting marketplace?

When Coca-Cola first entered the marketplace it actually contained amounts of cocaine. What is the "active" ingredient in your makeup, Merle? Will unsuspecting users find themselves flunking random drug tests? Now we understand why so many women are willing to pay so much for your product.

Tabberone has copies of communications in which eBay staffers openly admit the auctions were terminated at the "direct request of Merle Norman", presumably through their lawyers at Kinsella Weitzman Iser Kump & Aldisert LLP, of Santa Monica, California. Jennifer (last name not disclosed by eBay) of Kinsella Weitzman Iser Kump & Aldisert LLP, has not responded to emails demanding to know exactly why the auctions were ended.

Will drug enforcement agents begin crackdowns of the Merle Norman Cosmetic outlets? Will purchasers of Merle Norman Cosmetics find videotape of themselves on the late news as they are herded into police transport vans? Are women teachers violating the "Drug Free Zone" policies around schools by wearing and carrying Merle Norman Cosmetics?
Will Merle Norman shed all pretense and beging marketing cosmetics in more appropriate containers like these?

Do Merle Norman compacts come with a mirror for another reason than we originally thought? With a nail file, someone can scrape a line of facial powder onto the mirror and inhale while appearing to fix her makeup. Ingenious! It's no wonder teenage girls just can't wait to get into makeup. In more ways than one, it appears. It's little wonder that women can't wait to get their fix at the "approximately 2,000 independently owned and operated Merle Norman Cosmetic Studios in the United States and Canada."

It's all so ingenious. No one would suspect that the woman who is applying a little touch-up to her lipstick is actually a junkie. The drug being absorbed through her pouting lips. And her boyfriend thought he was getting light-headed from kissing her, not second-hand lip gloss.

So, what's next? eBay banning Chap-Stick spiked with menthol? No more Crest Toothpaste because of the flouride? Outlawing shampoos because they contain herbal medications? Hey, eBay? There's a lot of villages missing their idoits. They're all at eBay headquarters enforcing your stupid policies!

On July 30, 2007, Tabberone received an email from David Abramowitz

As of October 30, 2007, Merle NitWit is still falsely terminating eBay auctions claiming they violate eBay's Drugs and Drug Paraphernalia policy. How long will eBay and the federal authorities allow Merle Norman's lawyers to commit perjury.

Lawyer For Merle Norman Commits Perjury In NOCI

Update April 17, 2008
Merle Norman's unethical lawyers, Kinsella Weitzman Iser Kump & Aldisert LLP, proud winners of the Tabberone Hall Of Shame Putrid Plecostomus Award, are still committing perjury while illegally terminating eBay auctions. We quote them fully in this email dated April 10, 2008:

We are in receipt of your e-mail correspondence regarding your eBay auction termination(s). As stated on eBay's website, it is your responsibility to make sure that all items sold on eBay are being sold legally in the eyes of the law. As also stated on the website, eBay cannot and does not require that rights owners provide sellers with the exact reason for the removal of a listing. Despite this, please know that your listing was removed from eBay due to violations of the law, specifically federal Food & Drug (FDA) regulations. You may wish to consult the FDA's regulations for more specific information.

Are all of the stupid lawyers in California working for this one firm? Is there anyone at Kinsella Weitzman Iser Kump & Aldisert LLP who doesn't have their head up their ass? Last year, Merle Norman stated in Federal Court that they were no longer making these bogus FDA claims. Lie, lie, lie. Is that all the lawyers for Merle Nitwit can do?
Mothers, don't let your daughters grow up to use Merle Norman Cosmetics

Rebuttals
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If you, or your company, have been referenced on these pages, and you would like the chance to post a rebuttal, we will post your rebuttal (provided it is in good taste) so others can read it. The rebuttal must be submitted in a format that can easily be converted into HTML. We reserve the right to alter the rebuttal to make it more readable. However, we will not alter the content (unless there is offensive material to be removed). We also reserve the right to comment on any rebuttal received. Emails protesting the content of this web site may be treated as rebuttals by us at our discretion.
We made this offer a very long time ago and as of July 2007, only AnimieHot.com, in our Hall Of Shame, has chosen to submit a formal rebuttal.